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Death changes every thing...

Some one died. I will not say who, since that is not important. I will say that he was not liked by every one. To some he took and spent all night doing a job that should only take a few hours. This was said by many people. He stole cigarets and food from people. He died. Now a lot of people that complained that he stole alot of their stuff or never did his job as fast as he should are crying since he was found dead in his chair at his apartment. One person in particular who knows he stole food from them (caught him in their lunch bucket eating their food) all of a sudden is saddened by his death.

For me, i do not feel any thing. He was not a friend of mine, we did not like each other. But it seems his death has changed just about every one else. To me i can't get sad over a man that stole, cheated and other stuff. He might have been a good person to others, and for those that was his friends, i believe they should be sad with his passing. But don't expect me to be sad.

Now to the thought i am wondering. How is it a person can die and change the way people see him. He was a crook in their book, but when he died they all of sudden remember him as a good man.


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 30th, 2008 04:46 pm (UTC)
De mortuis nil nisi bonum.

Speak no ill of the dead. It is taboo, nothing more.

When my maternal grandmother died, she was not missed. She didn't deserve to be missed. People showed up at the viewing to make damned sure she was in the box and that the lid was locked tight.

When the minister referred to her as "loving wife, caring mother" everyone looked around to make sure they were at the right service.

But through it all, even knowing that her death didn't change the fact that grandma was a royal bitch in life, there is still a certain etiquette against speaking ill of the dead. Some people make the mistake of thinking this means you must speak well of the dead. Nope, just not ill. Or at least be selective whom you speak the ill around, somebody may have loved the asshole you rag on.
Nov. 30th, 2008 05:25 pm (UTC)
I wonder when Charles Manson dies will he be remembered as a good person. Did they say what a loving son Jeffery Dauhmer was. Will Fred Phelps be remembered as a great pastor.....
Nov. 30th, 2008 06:17 pm (UTC)
I rater doubt there was a service for Dahmer, nor will there be one for Manson. Are there people out there who interacted with those two, and had good experiences? Probably. But I doubt that their individual interactions are enough to keep them from realizing that Dahmer and Manson are/were very bad people.

And I am quite sure when the cult in Topeka finlly admits God or Whatever isn't going to reanimate the Zombie Fred, they will hold a big ol' memorial service for him, and everyone there will say good things, and mean them. Of course, the family members who left won't be there; nor will the families of the soldiers and citizens whose funerals he picketed.
Nov. 30th, 2008 07:25 pm (UTC)
That's when selective memory comes into play, and the eulogy is restricted to the youth of the departed. "He was a good boy, active in Boy Scouts, helped to raise his younger siblings." They stop at the point that neighborhood pets started disappearing and he build a cult compound.
Nov. 30th, 2008 11:36 pm (UTC)
The near-universal custom is that one does not speak ill of the dead before they're firmly planted and the honest mourners have had their grief time. Funerals are for the living who need to come to terms with the dead. You don't pee on the grave in daylight, either. If you want to sneak back after dark and pour that fifth of bourbon in front of the marker after filtering it through your kidneys first, be discreet.

People showed up at the viewing to make damned sure she was in the box and that the lid was locked tight.

They said much the same about my paternal grandfather, Verminius. He died before I was born, and I never heard a nice word about him--everyone was scared stiff of him even when he was in a wheelchair. Grandma never mentioned him once in my hearing. (I don't believe the story about the pallbearers having cinch-straps in their pockets just in case the lid started to rattle, though. I'm pretty sure the usual bolts and such were enough.)
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )


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Jimmy Hollaman and GUS

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